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We Aren't Supposed To Live 4Ever

by ayefelon

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1.
I got this feeling in my, soul That I’m next to go Realigned chakras, sharpen flow, now I’m next to blow Steady like a metronome Smokin Gas, Texaco shout out to El Salvador, the people call it Mexico I know, I know my Category underprivileged But I’m born to win, noone better in the business see the return on investment, made better sums Than these so called educated bums college got you spending all your parents funds, Broke bitch Don’t pretend to be a scholar, when I know you bogus And I know that you don’t really know shit smoking, hell is hot I’m brown, like I’m toasted The Indica, had baked me up, espresso darker roasted Ayo I’m posted up, kill or be killed no other option Bullseye, line em up proper, in my optical You need to, wait for it to set in Check your fuckin pockets - they’ll be empty if you let em Day of the dead, so I dead em Bleachin blood out my denim Fashionista, legend Hellen Keller federalis, if they catch me ain’t no tellin’ I go down independent, top of the charts, or in a prison Who is this? It’s felon Got this feeling in my bones Feeling frigid in my soul I got no problems picking bones I only leave clean bones x2 Verse 2 Jburn Verse 3 You better Wake up, you switched places With opposition Mirror different interactions, like a twilight edition The minutes run faster than a drill had went off, the sergeant said A faster man, that average 10 could never keep up, lapping em they see me twice, like an instant rerun Another cycle begun Cold no matter season similar to an anemic Heart beating like a madman Mad that I’m shining at the bottom of trash can Unique mineral, rare chemical make-up Fentanyl flow, die slow, down in the basement felon’ll phrase it, backwards, Led Zeppelin Thats death wish homie, how you dead set Your best bet, is Run like usain No but you’re insane, Bullet pieces go in brain I might be deranged Really, I aint changed Im more raw, I’m bloody bloody slaughter I’m charged up, boss like I’m godfather The hunted The hunter
2.
I had another run around the plane once again A Hunger , that No meal ever managed to maintain Weak brain and dumb decisions to make once Again I wish my friends knew how much they really save a friend I wish I coulda saved my friend I wish I coulda saved some ends Wish my kids had daddy money they could finally spend when they graduate with, honors, ayo that’s blood, it’s royal They say, hell is hot and blood will boil Well ima let you know I be choosing the wrong options, Depending on what angle of my thoughts I wanna posture I made some good picks tho, Saw some like, I could live with those Overlook some cuz I miss those Ayo, swimming river upstream fighting Made it to the ocean, and I located a Pisces, I felt like I was falling, but I hit the ground like lightning Next challenge, st Helen mountain started climbing Mentality shift, Seeds planted years ago start to grow Surprised at all things that I know Damn Flowers bloom, this time I’m aware and I know The reason I exist, is to feed and nurture this soul
3.
On the topic of If i pop or bust i realize, even my, life is Synonymous With, how it all started, where I’m coming from And how we de-part Deep dive each part, legal lingo Made my deposition to the most high, only believe in G O, D Cleanse my hands, winds of time dry em, we gon see Am I virtuous or, realistic? pessimistic negative or positive, or reminiscing remember when, I used to rob that store sometimes after school I don’t recall, dropping the ball, or being horrible No, It Wasn’t me, Look and see Too many goals to reach, not enough time to breathe Dragging feet, Iron cleats, prosperity Dichotomy I’m probably Spinning, made myself go round Another time around the same town where I think I lost it We on the topic ain’t we? Lit a light up faintly, back some years ago I went it slowly dimmed it’s out And here I go again Chorus A dollar and a dream Got me in debt with schemes A dollar and a dream Got me fucked up cant sleep A dollar and a dream Skewed vision I can’t see A dollar and dream Is never really what it seems never really bout a dream Rewinding back, to the time when my mind had some clarity The path I walked diverted bad I’m dropping salt Carelessly bare with Me The flaws are in the details, stop to admire Similar to house fires, They look better on a screen So I thought I that could do what’s on TV Thoughts budding, like the flowers, in a tree So I smoke em Pieces, drift, like catalyst, synopsis idk Waste away, rotting flesh, of my flesh, i decay turn to dust, cross fade, I’m fucked Did I make enough, ran out of paint for the brush I wasn’t painting that much, The clock ticked anyways, I never painted enough let the days Fade, thrill of chase, Set em straight Too late Can’t put a tooth back using toothpaste Or bring a suicidal person back after they choose fate Little understanding But I overstand what truth say Muramasa Now But I used to be masamune
4.
I been living low-key Quarantine, and house arrest, the same thing Smoking on so much weed I thought I might OD I took another hit of it instead when I said, that I was better off dead What I meant, was you better put a bullet in my head my defense up When I bleed, love to taste lead See Red, so much pent up Burn baby burn California wildfire, Front row seat Panoramic view Wide screen 4K, resolution Gotta see the whole thing High definition, my sense of winning Must be Cut from another item like lava Smoke rise from me reminiscent of a rasta Waiting in the dark rather pennywise to pop up Kill em all kill em all No evil will prosper Fuck that You know I’ll never falter, flow drippin like faucet You Better take precaution Every Misstep is costly I slither round the block Swervin Horse power serpent Earth flower burning Until i drop the curtain They all siren searching And pain always certain Creepin peakin through the glass Lurkin, lurking I slither round the block Swervin Horse power serpent Earth flower burning Until i drop the curtain They all siren searching And pain always certain Creepin peaking through the glass Lurkin, lurking
5.
Caskets 02:47
Sometime I think I wanna die I’m feelin tired many days late, dollars short, why do i even try I need to go out on a drive I need some time to let my mind, wander for a while Distraction from this life I been through this too many times, my life been jeopardized I’m tryna gather lessons in these shards of adolescence, I been a jerk, maybe karmic retribution all of the times, I acted stupid Was foolish Enough to do it hate me, I also hate wine they say it’s better after time remember picking fruit from of the vines I’ll be fine maybe for a reason, I decide It isn’t worth it, but I always keep it going, wonder why I don’t know I don’t know, I don’t know But I know there’s a reason for living for sure I don’t know, what it is But I’m learning and putting new words in my dictionary I’m creative and shit But I second guess it, and I guess this is the reason that I get depressed and I don’t know what to do, but write another record Spitting into the void, its coming back like echo Like a Deja vu, A big loop One lap, around you I’m gone, around who? That’s True I been absent a long time, I don’t deserve any shine All I got are these lines, a dream deferred and a grind, Always fail when I try I never cry This type of shit be happening to me like all the muthafucking time So much that I remember lines and all the different words That I would use Like It’s cool, I’ll be fine, it’s true, but I’m tryin to Keep it real, but I feel There ain’t an end in sight
6.
I said fuck making some friends It’s time to make a plan I was in the darkness I was left for dead Overthinking all my sins Never broke again Rockstar lifestyle Watch me crash the whip Cloud Six Keep the lights on when I hit the Switch Who this nigga think he is That lil black boy from the crypt Numbers low The love solidified That’s time that I invest I get resurrected every single time I slay a track Shawty asked me for a ride I told her Bitch get in the back Only show my wifey love You already know the rest The moon ah make my watches glow Just take a look down at my wrist I get love all down the coast of places that I never been Ima steel city nigga ain’t forgetting Where I’m from This yo wifey favorite song Shut the fuck up when I talk How they waiting on my answers Got me feeling like Oz It don’t get bumped if ain’t us Learn to love who I become From the earth We rise Into the earth We fall To Grow and learn the rules of land and truth Is law That’s all Kings never die We live, far too long Kings Never die We live, far too long From the earth We rise Into the earth We fall To Grow and learn the rules of land and truth Is law That’s all Kings never die We live, far too long Kings Never die We live, far too long I'm climbing out the tomb, Walk in darkness under the moon Roll with the crew, zgroup til my doom Vendettas in my view Criminal soul Feeling bold, I’m not so cold today I burst in flames The verse just laid itself out On a burning page The ashes fit in a urn, I made I made it in a way, more different than a mortal mind can comprehend In my vision I speak to my dead friends Told me I’m Stuck at a dead end Look at the art that my pen sketch My patterns of thought are endless Infinite bitches I impress This world is mine, it really is Don’t play pretend, you know it is I move my hand the tide will rise The earth will shift, I seen the shit I see it happen all the time Unexplainable shit that I can’t even put in a rhyme This is entry Number 9 - 9 I’m just a shell of who I used to be Relax, you should get used to me I know it’s too much truth to see Usually The wool is over ya eyes, Remove it, and you see us shine Deffgxd in his prime Ayefelon finally found alignment With some stars, in the sky Felt what the energy does No pushing it under the rug Unless it belongs under us I mean underground, bones turn to dust Mine are rusty, fight with time We never die, we stay alive, the conscious mind will survive From the earth We rise Into the earth We fall To Grow and learn the rules of land and truth Is law That’s all Kings never die We live, far too long Kings Never die We live, far too long From the earth We rise Into the earth We fall To Grow and learn the rules of land and truth Is law That’s all Kings never die We live, far too long Kings Never die We live, far too long
7.
I feel exhausted, I feel exhausted I was in the process of solving problems. I paused it Just to make a profit I made a profit lost it empty pockets now I’m picking pockets Often I’m cautious, in a awkward state of mind, I alter it by getting high Many faces on this diamond Pressure forced me into shine, many sides, inner ties, my third eye hypnotized me made my soul complex Accolades are null and void, I avoid the contests Sitting in a shadow, lady Meta am I lost yet Gone but I’m here, but I’m gone, but I’m conscious floating round, in circles, parrellel with different Objects Sometimes I want a explanation, just some proof that all us, been patient for a reason like we’re something more than stardust Like wassup, I’m calling God but I always miss a digit like allah thought I was so much smarter, trying harder now Chorus But, I’m outta breath, coughin, can hardly breathe Running laps around the sun, until I RIP I guess, I get no rest, I dedicated this mess, to self, neglect and all the hell that I felt Under the weather myself, Been better off I feel like I’ve fallen off What comes after when I reach The precipice the fuckin peak Like, if I end up getting seen Will I find some kind of peace Will I end up feeling free, finally Feel water beneath my feet, It’s always me Unlucky but try to see I treat the flooding like a beach Posting up, under an tree Wishing that it wasn’t me Sparking up a leaf again floating towards the sea again Lost and found, it’s me again
8.
I never meant to be, but the planets aligned what a familiar place, it kinda feel like a rhyme Infinite time, tell a story for me Let the cold wind blow, Wonder in my mind, can I? the lessons I learned They had to form me Right? Came to me from the dirt Laws of the land truth, had to teach me right Watched closely, a sight to to behold another tale to be told Been oddly gifted, since a little bit old Kept in a pocket My Writtens balled up, adjacent to my fist My turn, I watched another flight I missed like opportunity Like A Mandela effect Like standing in place but yo I know I took steps in the right direction, falling backwards Kinda difficult to put it back on track, the fact is I’m made of regrets, I hate the things that I’ve said I wish that I could reset, maybe it’s all in my head Bridge (Verse 2) Want it all to be over, but Ima wait for the day I'll draw pictures in the sand, in the mud, in the meantime A play button, stop button, and rewind Finger never leave the land, drawing 1 line Guesing why in heaven would I ever really think about usin Them, Since I barely ever use em with music And life is like a song, you never get the message til you hear the shit cut off And everything gets dark, like it wasn't already This is big but we never really ready for heavy Who knows where we're headin Everyday comes barreling Falling from the sky It’s a heaven sent derelict Distracted by mentality of keepin up Appearances Everyday, I rise Lifting weights, til i die, roll the dice, think twice Think not I’m always all in Cuz I wonder what my calling is Another waste of time I could lost in Or a lock and key I am the lock, the thoughts are key It’s all a part of me Til I RIP If I RIP

about

This is my second official album. I hope you enjoy it.. this is about mortality and how often i question the purpose of it and my mortal thoughts. I am only human

credits

released August 28, 2020

production by:

Grant4ore
Gusto Shade
Eeryskies
Miami Dave
Khiminsky
Riddiman
Luke

Featuring

JBurn
Para Da Ox
Substance P
Leon (RIP)
Liz

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all rights reserved

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about

ayefelon Richmond, Virginia

This is ayefelon aka Saint Laren. This is my form of hiphop. Mine is a journal. where I try to verbalize trying to get to a place an how it’s not always a simple path. Something like that. You can learn about me here probably. Anyway… I’m a drifter too. Rest in peace Leon forever. Check out my work. Peace ... more

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